The Exacto-Putt is guaranteed to help you make every putt you ever stand over* for the rest of your golfing career.**
The device is deceptively simple. Constructed of bleeding-edge, next-generation corrugated cardboard, emblazoned with the DIVOT Industries logo and various postal minutia, and fully customized with your name and address, it arrives on your doorstep ready for immediate use. Just follow these 10 simple steps prior to immediate use:
1. Bring the package inside your home.
2. Locate some scissors, pocket knife, keys, or any other sharp implement.
3. Use said implement to bisect the top lid of the Exacto-Putt. CAREFULLY. You don’t want to damage this bad boy.
4. Remove whatever packaging material is contained inside the Exacto-Putt.
This packaging material will vary from box to box putting aid to putting aid, but rest assured that it has been carefully chosen for its superior ability to maintain the structural integrity of the Exacto-Putt in transit.
Also, it’s part of the customization of each product. It’s “random customization”–yeah, that sounds sexy. Leave it in there.
In most cases, this randomly customized packaging material may contain any mix of the following:
- T-shirt-shaped cotton filler
- Golf ball-shaped multi-core filler
- Golf shirt-shaped nylon blend filler
- Golf tee-bag-shaped wooden filler
In rare cases, you may find your randomly customized packaging material to be made of:
- Golf bag-shaped filler
- Golf club-shaped filler
5. Carefully remove the filler material, being sure not to damage the Exacto Putt.
At DIVOT Industries, we pride ourselves on being stewards of the environment, so we strongly encourage you to recycle these materials when possible and if in accordance with all applicable local, state, federal, international, and galactic laws. Our DIVOT-gineers have found the club-shaped filler to make excellent compost, breaking down almost immediately into rich, black compost embedded with unicorn seeds ready for germination.
6. After setting aside the filler material, an optional (but strongly suggested) step is to take a deep breath. You are about to embark on a journey that may well transform your putting to the level of Woods, Nicklaus, or any of the putting masters in golf. A moment worthy of pause, we feel.
7. Place the Exacto Putt on any floor-like surface.
8. Grab your putter of choice and practice your stroke, trying to keep the toe of the putter head equidistant from the Exacto Putt with every stroke. This motion promotes muscle memory in developing a non-arching stroke. You can practice with or without a ball. We recommend both.
9. Repeat 10256! times.
10. Watch the ladies say “Hey!” and the fellas say “Ohh!” as you sink putt after putt…After putt…After putt…
*Guarantee applies only to putts of less than 1.5 inches in length